The Ohanang Generation Documentary

The docci on a good roll so far, thanks to all who took part, more pictures tio be uploaded

#TOG Documentary

Dear friends, the Ohanang family is at it again. we working on a doci for our blog mainly focussed on lifestyle ya kasi, so if you are based around Pretoria and would like a interview/feature in our film please send me your deatils to djkgaoza@yahoo.com ,BBM 29481EBB or Whatsapp me 0782749575

Ska lebala go downloader daai #TOG soundtrack ko  http://t.co/dLZghqKQ

Kontrolo ngwana!!!!

 

 

@djkgaoza @Ohanang

http://facebook.com/djkgaoza

 Image

THE OHANANG GENERATION PART 7

Image

Spring se fihlile and mo loxion ke di party left right n center, babangwe ba tshwere ke stress sao hladiwa want baie van ons batho babantsho renale style sao kreya motho for every season, boma sdudla for winter and slender for summer le spring. Ebe re lebale gore sona sdudla seo re’s hlalang sei kantse go rata ka pelo eyohle ebe aofe seseng le seseng ose nyakang. Kaone rena authis renoba di forever flop we miss the important details of relationships and just chase mapyatla waya waya net fela for status sagore batho ge bao bona bare “eh daai man ke mpya, oja di chuma fela and o di changer like di boxer”. Le banyana bateng bao traisa authis ba naleng lerato ba tibisa di charmer net fela for flaunting, bra yena gana taba solanka a betha 1 da. So every month its a new guy, go beiwa photo mo  di social networks then ba hlagella saam ko menateng hand-in-hand, lyena bra ae puditse gore kyena las want o tshwere chuma, knowing little gore ompor half ya nyoras setse ba bethile gona da. Kamo ngwanyana teng ga fele menateng, every weekend yena ke di “checked in at _____ with _____”. Let’s be on the real, eteng authi e nyakang go nyala motho wao phela menateng? Le lona authis lenoba di flopo kao tibisa penty ya kontle le ko groovas ebe le tlisetsa msadi malwetse ko gae, akere don’t have a lil fun on the side mara kere before taking action, stop and think for a while, how will it affect you or your relationship in the long run? and Is it really worth doing?

BO PAPA/MAMA S’MANG MANG

Ka tshepa I’m not the only 1 who feels this way mara re lapile go bona bo papa smang mang ko groovas. Ek mean le lona la jumpa nthwe bline, o kreye a 40 year old a jiva le lepipitlane lao kena matric nakweo o shile ncosi yao lekana le yena daai tiken ko dladleng. Well nna I feel gore as soon as bao shapela daai 40th birthday ke sign yaore nako yagao yao groova ko di commercial venues n events e fetile, or at least vaya di jazz or meskien bo ma di societ tsela tsa di tie n uniform and o tlogele di club to rena di jong span. O kreye mama Thandi a shapile ke di savana tse 3 nakweo setse a thoma go shapa di patlama tussen di lighty, then o expecta gore kaosane re mo  hlomphe? Then kamo ba nyaka go re botsa gore re phela masepa. Ish bo mamazala le bo timer, kgopela le itsi di pleke tsa lona tsao groova le tlwele go ira tliasego ka bana ba lena and lena timers le tlwele go rekela di chacha mabyala ao tura ko gae gosena le bhupi, but I’ll get back to this one later on.

LEPANTA.

Piece by Emmanuel “FUDGE” Selamolela

Society has taught us that it is ok when a man has more than one wife but it’s unacceptable when a woman has more than one man… Well from point of view, I think both are just unacceptable…

mara let’s just say ne ele byao vele ….well some chicks seem to defy the odds, coz okreya ngwanyana ajola omtrent 8 ya ma outhi asa bone wrong, mara tseo tsona ke metsi amannyane, what realy sickens me is that okreye ngwanyana ale busy le bras ma outhi ba baskimaneng as if yena ke las number player kore you don’t understand gori pila.pila ngwana o onagan byang or.feela byang a’skepa kwena this week and then next week askepa ke achoose ya gaow ..antsi aistsi .gori ledi fo le .braas ..kori Kate potsisa gori .yena GE antse Ali one ..ote potsang ngwana .natho ? ..” I’m the shit? ”Ke traisa skim sosotle sa ma’outhi?”  Hai. ‘oh well, none the less .bateng bona bana ba ba so and I’m sure we all know one or two. I know most of you ladies may be like I’m discriminating against yall and saying it’s alright for a guy to sleep with more than one woman. But unacceptable when a woman sleeps with many guys, well just remember that if a key can open more than one lock, it’s called a master key…. but if a lock can be unlocked by any key it is a crappy lock and pretty much useless.

NEGLECT AND SHINE

Since eba nna akeso be le burden yao gudisa ncosi (baby) mara ka itsi difficulty yateng want I’m an uncle to 4 and ke gudile in a fatherless household, mara taba ya gore motho o kreye a apere pila, meriri ele up to form and always got cash to go out mara ngwana otswa mamina, gana s’bathu and o dichila okare o advertiser tshokolo is net kaak, ladies I’m not saying yall shouldn’t pamper yourselves mara try to make your children 1st priorities. Ene taba e yagore yall gon put all financial burdens mo timer ke masepa, it takes two to create ncosi, so you own an equal share of responsibility to ngwana lwena. Ene taba yao tsamaya le ngwana rond and bond making the baby call all your male friends malome is ook net kak, o nyatsisa le timer la ngwana gao, nagana gore daai bra o feeler byang when he hears ngwana a ova ka malome steve le kamkho yena malome steve amo reketseng ice cream kateng and a rekela mama plate ya di ribs ko spur then la mo  shiya mo  pela tv la te khyella ko kamoreng. Bana ba ase di bhari, ba taper everything that happens so kenore fela if le nale bo promiscuous le bo baby mama mentality, berekisa ncondo ya motswadi, not an adolescent teenager.

SATANE

I wrote this insert from a very recent experience or I or I could so say event.

So gonale batho ba bao sa rate go bona batho ba babedi ba thabile, ge ba ka bona wena le motho wagao le phedisana monate and your relationship flourishing ba thoma boloi, they go to the biggest extent to dig out old skeletons from your closest. Once they find gore you don’t have any scandals they start making up lies telling your partner gore wena ojola le ______ bao bone le yena ko ________ nakweo o kreye ne osatswa le ka jarata ka beke eo mara story sona se teng. And nthwe eleng sleg ka die mense ke gore in most cases ke bras tsa gao ore bras tsa motho wagao. Hence the say “in every relationship there is 2 happy lovers, an ex tryna break you apart and a few friends hoping to see that happen while they pretend gore ba le thabela and omo 1 o vayang di ngaka nine9 wasting his/her cash a jumpa di mbaola and buying potions that won’t even work so they can have a go at your partner. Mara boloi okase bo fetse, net nthwe nka le botsang ke gore hlompang di relationship tsa batho babang and if you know gore o single tlwela go zama gofa batho advice want lwena wa bona gore tsao ratana di go palletse, d’is hoekom ole sonoro.

BO MISS PSL

Agona wrong le go jola a super star or sports man, mara fashion e ya banyana ba mo Pretoria yao jola di soccer star is net kaak, lei fetola di tlaela and shaming your family name, going for gashu yao hloka ncondo. Kamo wa itsi gore o number 11 mo list ya megwanthi mara osa lwela da. Chances of him infecting you with an STI or STD are really high as you aren’t certain. Well a ke fyele motho mara ra di itsi ba itsi megwanthi yao tapa ke bafana ba Mvela le PSL, so bra’s dlallang kgole if le sa batla go phela sbaka nyana. Still not dissing or hating mo bafana bao dlala bolo, net la itsi gore ba phela byang, and most of the time banale go shapega kaonne abana di regte. So ge di’chacha tsa bona di le unavailable they resort to mekoro eme swak. O kreya daai nine ele sfebe sa magindza, kamo o tsamaya a nyobisa every gashu e mo rekelang 6 ya cider. So o nagana malwetse ao tlelang ona net da and weer kamo di febe di tlonna di go lata ka skiem, nakweo you are around 23-26 ka mengwaga then o late ke lepipitlane lao kena grade 11 le skiem sa gae bao botsa gore otswe mo jubeng ya bona. Kamo bao tshepisa di mpama while causing a scene ko pela ko wena. Kaosane bo makhi bo labella byang? O thoma go nyatsa ke di gashu mo strateng, geo thoma ore w aba fohlela bare “shut up wena,re tlao biletsa bale ne bao peipa ko pela kweno”. So bo my sister, die baling pila cause fashion nyana e ya lena is net kaak.

BO BIG TALK + GWABABA = NO ACTION

La ba itsi moes? All talk and no action. Ba rata go ova ka di cheri tsa bona which you’ll never meet, batla nyaka go botsa ka banyana asif bona ke di guru tsao jola. Mara if le ko menateng and some ladies join you on your table, motho o fetoga smumu, I’m talking about funeral silence. Nigga will be kissing his beer bottle the whole knight ebe lona le fase sale banyan aba fihlile tlebe aitse hello fela. As I laugh while typing this containg myself from naming some people as a friend warned me about getting shot, mara nnete ke nnete. Ladies, if a brother is all talk and acting suspicious or very quiet ko tafoleng finishing all the beers then congratulations. You’ve spotted a victim of gwababa. Shame mara it’s ok if he’s still in his teens for most young girls find a shy boy cute, but if that nigga over 20 then he has a serious problem. Nthwe tshegisang ka majita aoba le gwababa kore aba shote nex. Kere transie eteng, kontol ya zaka e teng, plus le ntlu or skampie sa mabaibai, mara okae utlwi bare lenyore la puller vandag. Always ke yena o driver di bras tsa gae le di couple tsa bona gae, or yena ba phela bam o drosra ale 1. Worse part abana le di regte, kore ke kgope mara yena he claims to know so much about women. Mara otlareng? Machancera ga fele.

BO BRA VOLKSWAGEN POLO/G5/G6

Ok let’s be on a real note now, brothers… arena jealous gore le kgona go patella installment sa 2tao/pm (R2000/pm) on your latest polo or golf GTI ne. Mara show off ya lena is really unnecessary, ek mean if some of rena di lighty re ka tlwela sgela ra botsa batswadi bantshe deposite ya transie n pay di installment ka tuition fees I bet re ka reka di Volvo or Mercedes. So kgopela le hafole dilo tse le di irang, you know what I’m talking about mus. Ene taba yaore wena o vaya ka transie ya latest model, nakweo wena osa pitlahantsha ban aba kweno ko ntlung ya 4 room or osa robala kamo zozong yao thibiwa mesoba ka newspaper enoba bo tlaela. Straight talk, baie van jull kasi outhies is net di flop and di gashu. A wise man would know to invest in lifetime assets like a house or stable business. Mara since we live in a society of show offs and hoe’s that wana be sponsored instead of getting good grades and seeking a stable career, we fall victim to the trap that our enemies wishes upon us “failure to launch”. So rather flaunt with fortunes while having investments and insurance moola than throwing change in the air while knowing you are still in dept.

Otherwise, kasi will never be kasi without such charecters, and apologies on the late issue, due to management glitches. But until next month kere kontrolo ngwna!!!!!

Let’s discuss the topics on social networks, our details are below

 

LET’S TREND

                      #TOG #OhanangGeneration #Part7

                    Image

 

The Ohanang Generation Part 6

Image

Greetings and salutations to all ma readers, viewers and all those who just read to criticize,

Ke tshepa le enjoyile yalls July, “the stress month”, for it is now where alotta young men are at the suicide peak as they got the good/bad news that they are soon going to be fathers, mara le sa bala. Life is all about reproduction so congrats to all the mothers and dads to be, so now let us commerce with what yall came here for

Honesty

Living in the world of today, everything happens so fast, before you know it, you have said words which weren’t intended to be sent to the next party. I could say we have all been in a state of denial, either we lie to our selves about situations we in just to console our state of emotion or try to forget a situation that has occurred, but what I wanna know is why would one put him/herself in so much pain when the truth is always bound to set you free? For instance, you get results of a blood test and they read positive. Lying to yourself that they were all a mistake is just as close to beating yourself up for no reason, and which will just lead to tolling and slowly deteriorating yourself. So for one to find happiness, one has to be honest with one’s self and learn to accept things as they are. As you might have noticed I like including the words “malapa ga lekane”- Some people seem to have misread the message I’m conveying to the audience and think my blog is all bout giving a bad image to banyana ba kasi le bophelo ba mashigu, need I remind you that churches are empty these days only coz the youth pay attention to education in a hidden message form, for example if I did a sexual math song, I bet they would remember all the formulas to solving the mathematical problems .so it came to me a few weeks ago when I had a talk with my friend Kenny, we were conversing on the topic bout how life can be depressing somtimes geo bona gore di thaka tsa gao dia phomella and wena nakweo dilo di sharakane, you peers buying flashy cars, getting good paying jobs with no qualifications and  nakweo wena o imela ke depression gore why wena dilo tsao di sa pope, keng nkare modimo gao verstane and all that. So you start playing the blame game, eitha o blamer setswadi or situation sa ko wena which automatically leads to denial (dishonest) to yourself. You are ripping yourself off the building stones that will mold you as soon as you learn to accept situation. So I quote Kenny’s words “we all have our given time to prosper, some people just fall into luck naturally and some of us have to work for success, but in the end, Modimo o beile nako for rena bobohle, lentse ekaba after mengwaga, but in the end tlebe dilo tsao dintse wete”.

Mapipitlane

My bras kgopela lei holokomeleng when it comes to under age girls who love the fast life and having a good time. Sometimes you find gore she lies about her age saying she’s 19 or 18 net for gore a kgone gonwa byala or she would be on some tip gore setswadi asena taba ka what she does so dilo di mthebelele. Skae tshepa taba eo, so from now on if you have the feeling gore motho o ke ngwana,
ask for her ID because o tla shwela ntho osae itsing, worst of all they are very conniving for the story changes when the parents find out about her activities and the older boyfriend “you”. O fetoga the big bad wolf who was forcing everything onto her. So if dilo go to the hands of the law, you have no say in this for she is a minor and knowing well that she is one, whatever you did with her will be set as statutory rape, whether she agreed to it or not, even if yall did not engage in any sexual activities, being with her will just lead to and offense of criminal record to your name so can yall try atleast le ba tlogeleng till ba gola nyana coz taba ya ma-authi atlo chechella ko tronkong for taba tse so ase stelle so net reba shape ka skhiya for nako nyana wamferstana?

Love

As much as le ka ngangisana, there are ladies out there who have that real love. Kore ga nyake go utlwa nex ka banna babangwe except for the one she is with. Its been years since I’ve been to a wedding mo kasi, so this just goes to tell me gore batho abasana lerato, bophelo ba nou ke ba di van n set, but yet you find these women who are ready to settle and tie that knot, so in the end flopo is in us men. Re tshaba commitment cause we are so greedy and re rata go retiwa for dilo tse snax, we have this motto of “why settle for beef when I can also have lamb”. That’s where the whole problem/matter begins, we fear being loyal n sticking to one girl while we busy chasing after megwanthi eminchi, and seize to ignore the love we could be getting from sticking to one woman. While we chase loose skirts we chase diseases and miss the opportunities to finding a faithful partner so my conclusion to this is we men are the reason why gosena manyalo and go tletse megwanthi mo Gauteng. So bras kgopela re rateng banyana ba rena and if you on that tip ya gore jou kind wao tima so wena u wana have ba ko mapayeng fela then you need to ask yourself what is it that you are doing wrong gore she won’t give you that trust gore a ka gofa yona. I quote “Men who are in stable relationships never go hungry”.

Cheap niggas

There is a very big misconception between cheap men and low budget fellas, so women ba fyela the wrong ones because of this huge misunderstanding.

On the previous topic I discussed taba ya gore malapa ga lekane, so we come back to the discussion yagore banna ba dula bale depressed coz ba gatellega in most cases like when it comes to a situation where he has to take his girl out. Some of these young women abane verstaan gore motho ga kgone go afforda so when he takes her to ko sterland she gon complain gore yen o nyaka goya ko Nu-metro coz chomi yagae Cindy ba mo isa ko teng, or she only wants to dine ko spur and will never touch a nandos plate so this all leads to depression for the poor fella. Cheap niggas ke bale bao rata go fluanta dilo tsao tura, the lavish life, designer clothes and nice cars but when it comes to a point where he has to take care of real bills he will just fold his arms and look at the lady. So coming back to the ladies, if you think your man can’t afford your lifestyle, best leave him and find a rich brother who will ,but do keep in mind that these money throwing
guys are more to what meets the eye, so if he tells you to do something out of your comfort zone, osa makala, it just comes with the cash he will be spending on you. So leave low budget brothers to the understanding girls, and the cheap niggas to megwanthi and if you have an expensive maintenance plan like a german car then go for the rich pervs or just get a job and maintain your own lifestyle.

Big vs Small

Dear fellas, just because you have an ak-47 in your pants do not necessarily mean you are the world’s greatest sex guru. Some women kindly asked me to educate yall about pleasuring a woman since I gave them a heads up mo di tabeng tsa di 1 noto on the previous issue.

  • Pumping real fast doesn’t fascinate all women; take time to know what pleases your woman. Some ladies are very fond of oral sex, plus it has the advantage to greater chances of orgasm, but not all women are fans of licking the cake so take a different approach and play around touching her all over till you find that tickle spot.
  • 4play is an essential when it comes to got steamy love making. Imagine going down a dry water slide… well that’s what your lady feels if you penetrate without arousing her sweet juices. Or while yall busy and she goes dry, might be results of well stimulation, so stop that humping and get back to touching and kissing so get her back into that mood.
  • There is no shame in spoiling your lady with a nice massage or talking dirty with her, she’s not always in that love making mood. Sometimes she wishes to see that thug in you, so do well and show her that wild side of yours.
  • Do not be afraid of sexting your lady, chances of you learning what really puts her on are very high in this situation.

With these tips you can never go wrong, so go out there and explore your woman, remember that life is all about learning, so do your lady right!

From me and the ohanang team, kere le saleng sentle till our next topic droping next month (on my birthday) so le sa chaba go nkopella akere..

Don’t forget to follow me on twitter ke @djkgaoza if you wanna discuss any of this month’s topics or from my previous blogs.

 

Stay well ka KONTROLO ngwana!!!!

 The Ohanang Generation Part 5

Image

 

Dumelang my fellow ohanang readers, ke tshepa gore le sa phidile sentle and are now sitting back with a bowl of popcorn anticipated about what I have for yall this month…

Apologies on the delay knowing that you were so anticipated mara nna ka le shapa ka mumish, ish snet taba tsa di network recession wabo

Well June has come to an end and I bet we all have experienced/collected some crazy/fun moments during this cold month. Some of yall might have been used, dumped, betrayed or maybe found love ra celebrater bo june 16, father’s day and school closings/pens down for mapipitlane. Either way it might have been a great month mara nna kesa lla ka flopo nyana e 1, these weak assholes that cannot stand for a fight but are very quick to fold fists when coming to women. As much as I would talk a lot of crap about basadi on my blogs, I cannot stand a man that hits his better half. Whether ke mokoro wagao or nine/regte yao brothers we have no right to lay a hand on them. So one here’s the deal if you know any guy who does this please name and shame him with his picture included so we can expose these bastards on the coming blog.

 

“NYATSI”

So gonale these ladies ba jelang batho di juba (bo miss mangf mang) so proud about being nyatsi ya eimand & will even describe the way a mofang yona kateng. She will even tell you how his real girlfriend asa mofeng yona kateng and how she would satisfy him kateng. Kore ga hlabe ke kgala motho wateng, ebile gana flop ge bamo phega nine9, otla mmona ka go jikelwa ko corning kabo 6am… ga fihlisiwi le ko di taxing to show that yena kwa ko mapayeng fela. Ge a bhanisiwa bhana yateng ba e phega okare ba phega mpya ya mtatsetse. Let’s be on an honesty tip, we all know of someone omo so ene eba sono ka yena ko mogroovong when the guy shows up le regte and she will go and pretend asif gae moje taba, mara we can all see gore kukhona ok’shaya amanzi. So she will be like ‘’ne chomi that girl ke bhari, we all know gore the nigga loves me and not her’’. Then the bostro won’t even look at her le ga one, skars le hello nyana. She gon drink till she gets fucked up (mabyala) then starts doing silly things that gon irritate her friends or a tshware plaka net to cause a scene at a club, a late daai nine (regte) and start telling her masepa and that’s when she be getting a warm klap she will never forget. Well what I’m saying is ladies learn to respect yourselves & I’m not saying don’t have a lil fun but please learn to do it with a little dignity also knowing & expecting the consequences or outcomes of your actions cause taba ya gore le tlo te bhanisa ka bomo via di nyatsi and leaving your child fatherless e tlo re lapisa while knowing very well gore to him you are just a side dish and nothing more.

 

“Trend setters”

So sad to see that monate wa kasi has lost its meaning and its soul purpose, the nice tunes that the dj will be droping will fall to deaf ears since people go out to flaunt their fongkong gear le pay nyana ya 5tao then kaosane motho gana le zaka ya petrol to go to work. Gone are the days when Mamelodians would come together to the dance floor and chant together…… 

“ELA ELA ELA ELA!! Thiba nthwe monate, Akere wa mmona! Wammona wetsang? Fao sa jive mmao gao rate! O tshasa vaselina!!! O ngwana mang wena? Baby ya mavuso etang!”

Nou when going out you have to worry about daai mense that be looking at gore onwang, o apereng and o vaya kang. The dance floor became a WIFI hotspot with bo miss mang mang tweeting and BBMing di skempe ka Thandi’s heels tsa ko makuleng and how they be drinking Glenmorangie le kamkho thabo asajeng nex kateng that night since he’d just be drinking di Heineken fela kateng. Kore ba lebala le gore why they went out. Next thing those megwanthies bao fasa ka di dumane tlebe ba jiva bo forspoto next thing o mmone bamo tseya ka masepa then kontle motho utlwa ka di mpama coz o gana go skepiwa after yena le di chomi tsae ba bathile bill ya tao eits. Shout out to the ladies bao te kgona and don’t need no mageza to buy em drinks so that they can have a good night and salutation to my bras bao hlapelwa ka di black label, klipdrift le di hansa then bring live to the building with their crazy dance moves and big shout out to the ladies ba mashayedi that be on the “I don’t give a fuck” tip. I hope this spring we will be having that partying spirit that brought us together kobo Moretele park, Phola park, Jack Budha, Class Extreme, & corner couch. Back when there was no The Village, Moloko and Hatfield Square was considered as ko matataneng, back when Gucci could only be afforded after saving for months and di dumane ne di tshabiwa. Back when you could go out alone and make friends ko pele and di dj ne di balega mo kasi, cause we are slowly becoming di khotane le rena and ga le jumpe nthwe blaine. 

 

“One Noto!”

As much as lei chabang kateng ladies, statistics has proven gore 8 out of 10 spekes will most likely be victim of it. I’m not talking bout rape ne, no don’t get it twisted di 1not is when a brother whispers those sweet nothings and lwena wa wela so wa skepiwa then abasao fonela kaosane. This is also likely to happen to men too so fellas don’t think these women aren’t as conniving as we are. Some women then tend to think that if you apply the 90 days to the cookie jar rule then you are safe from such acts, well di 1not can still occur even if o ntraisa for di kgwedi, nothing will stop me from go chabela after getting what I wanted in the 1st place.

Well I’ve compiled a few ways to avoid such and you can thank me later after trying em with that potential, harde bras but it’s best if we give the ladies a lil heads up.

Compile a serious investigation on that potential bostro. If you aren’t certain about his intentions ka wena, find out gore o jola le mang, o skima bo mang and o phela byang. If he is single find out the reasons that led to his breakup and if o skiema di player, dig a lil on his past relationships (the type of girls he dated). If his got a girl then its most likely gore you just gon be a side dish or he might be in a process of leaving her for you. NB: if he does leave her for you then chances are that he might leave you for someone else too so be careful when coming to such.

Test the waters: Go to his place, but don’t give the cookie up. Insist on watching a movie nyana so, and then in the middle of the movie get a lil kinky. Kiss him till his gun stands to salute, then stop and tell him you aint really ready, that was a mistake. If wa kwata insist on giving him a bj or hand job coz he just might be dying from letswai, Blow job most preferable… theres no harm in sucking some dick (if you against bj’s then hambofa!). If he refuses the offer and just demands punani fela then you already know his intentions, so walk away.

Send him dirty texts to see his reaction on em, if he plays along then test the waters by saying I want you so bad right now but can’t give it up because (you excuse/reason). If wa kwata then you have your answer.

Ask him to go out to a very public place where you most likely to bump into a lot of people that knows him e.g.: park, shisa nyama, restaurant or pub. If he tells you ka mochayo insist on taking care of the fees or bill, If you get an excuse then you have your answered, but be careful for some bostros are slick and know how to play their cards very well. You might be introduced as a close friend, colleague or maybe a study mate.

When you have tested the waters well enough, had alota oral sex and foreplays with no penetrations involved and you are now really assured that it’s safe to give it up….

Monyobe!! Ya….Moje strong gore he won’t even forget a second of that intimacy. The only way to a mens heart these days is good sex. Hence the phrase “omo shapile ka penty”. If a brother is pussy whipped then it’s obvious that he will find it hard to run from you. Mara just because you got him in the palm of your hands don’t mean you have to relax. Always keep in mind that gonale bale bao shapa skero so keep the sex on a good peak and his yours for keeps. Fellas this tip applies to you too

If you do this all well then you will not have to worry about di 1not but if it happens that wao chabela then you should consider seeing a sangoma or moporofeta (onale senyama jo).

 

“Possessive”

As much as we love to be made to feel special, there is none more irritating than that possessive lover who’s always breathing on your neck like lephodisa lao hloka uniform. Matters would reach a point where you have to send in a request before oya le spaza, then suddenly all your friends are not good for you (according to yena) but you’ve known em longer than him/her. Then suddenly it gets to a point where you aint supposed to go out on weekends nomo but yena ga fele menateng, ladies would get a dik donner to stay in, then fellas ba shapiwa ka emotional blackmail. Go maizisiwe nyana then bao shape ka lets swap phones for the day. Every girls/guys number who isn’t related to you gets deleted. Which reminds me of banyan aba kasi bao rata go te for a. ladies when fighting for a guy please stop using the term “monna waka” bona mo, wa te fora. Chances are that o nyatsi fela so save yourself the embarrassments till you have tied that knot. 

 

“Just in case Ovias”

Bo sostro ashiba batla ka merwalo ko megroovong okare they going home (Limpopo), o kereya motho a tshwere di extra penty, combs, vaslapi le di lotion. Nakweo motho gana juba but it looks as if she and her man have arranged that straight after da goiwa moskepong, so we clearly know that yena o twayetse gore yena every time she goes out o vaya le di stranger at the end of the night. Ebile we don’t have to name em coz la ba itsi mos mara otherwise ke botshelo jo, re tla direng

 

Well I hope we’ve learnt a lil from this month’s issue so from me and the ohanang family (you) kere enjoy your July. Don’t forget to follow me @djkgaoza and share your comments and views on this article stay safe, re tla thulana ka August

KONTROLO NGWANA MMA!!